This month’s new word is a phenomenon I’ve often discussed with polyamorous friends: One of you has a new love, relationship, or flirtation. Your other partner(s) feel jealous–and you are completely mystified. You have forgotten what it is like to have your beloved suddenly starry-eyed for someone else. My husband Oz came up with this new word for our love lexicon:

Poly-amnesia

A. A state of complete forgetfulness or amnesia–when you can’t understand why your spouse, or significant other(s)  feels jealous about your new relationship.

B. Not remembering what it is like to be on the other side, to be the one feeling threatened.

C. Saying really dumb things like– “Did you have a difficult childhood? Because there’s absolutely no reason for you to feel threatened!”

I think this is a syndrome and a part of consensual non-monogamy. As a side note, I think this is one of the challenges of mono/poly relationships–if one of you is in a state of constant poly-amnesia, they have very little empathy for the monogamous partner who is dealing exclusively with jealousy.