5 Principles to Create Satisfying Love
Relationship Artistry has 5 fundamental principles that make relationships vibrant and fulfilling. This is a state-of-the-art and revolutionary way to build thriving relationships—with close friends, intimate partners, and between parents & children—based on respectful communication, not having an ownership mentality, loving with compersion, and honoring both the differences and the fulfillment of each person’s unique values and needs. These life skills and philosophies allow people & families to grow together.
#1 Be Present in Your Relationships
Socrates said, “To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom.” Relationship Artistry is about bringing wisdom into your relationships. To have satisfying relationships you can’t be looking at the present through a lens of past wounds. Work toward healing and understanding your past traumas. Unfortunately, we live in a world that has racism, poverty, violence, and misogyny, to name a few contributors to trauma. Trauma can affect our hopes, dreams, and expectations of what is possible in relationships. You don’t have to be perfect or self-actualized, the process of nurturing yourself and understanding past traumas can allow you to be more fully in the present and make conscious positive choices.
#2 Expect & Create Reciprocity and Balance in Your Relationships
Relationship Artistry isn’t about dancing alone–it’s a dance between people, maybe even a whole dance troupe. Who you cast in your life is crucial to the relationship’s success. Pick good dance partners or people eager to learn to dance. (In a longer blog, I will address relationship artistry with people you can’t cast ie parents, children, and workplace relationships.) Pick people invested in embodying these principles with you and on their own.
#3 Show up with Excellence
Relationship Artistry incorporates learning communication skills, knowledge of boundaries, and consent, all of which create vibrant, dynamic connections. Showing up with excellence is also about practicing generosity and forgiveness in relationships. Again, this is about the process, not perfection, and bringing mindful awareness when things go awry.
#4 Let Go of Ownership Mentality
We live in a world in which there is an undercurrent of ownership in relationships that goes back to the slave trade. Historically men have owned “their” women and children as property. Authoritarianism and ownership mentality can show up in parenting as well. If you are stepping on someone’s agency, the relationship will not be authentic and will not thrive. Relationship Artistry is a new model of relationships not built on power-over but on dynamic and authentic interactions.
#5 Celebrate the Human and the Divine
Be ready to laugh at your flaws and mistakes, and be in awe of your magnificence and the magnificence of those around you. Strive not to take people in your life for granted; accept their humanity, and celebrate them for their unique contribution. All life is precious.