Sexuality is on a spectrum—for most people sexuality is fluid. I have friends who have many lovers. I have other friends that are totally monogamous. Both ends of the spectrum have their advantages. Most of us live somewhere in the middle range of the poly/monogamy spectrum. Given the statistics…

My version of poly is unique as I imagine everyone’s is. I live in a duplex with my current husband, and two kids. My former husband lives on the other side of our duplex. My current husband’s kids live half the week with us. This is my version of…

A few weeks ago I read this article in the New York Times, “Does a More Equal Marriage Mean Less Sex?” http://www.nytimes.com/2014/02/09/magazine/does-a-more-equal-marriage-mean-less-sex.html Equality in the bedroom–could be the culprit in creating tremendously boring sex. There is a cultural belief and accepted “norm” that long term relationships eventually lose their…

In polyamory, jealousy can be a dirty word. A person should be self-actualized and thrilled their lover is getting laid. But what if jealousy is positive, and shows energy and investment in your relationship? That sounds great—but what do you do when the green monster rears its head?

Here are…

Relationship for me is a vehicle for growth and transformation. When I have moments of illumination or leaps forward in consciousness it is usually in relation to another person. I am a people person. My situation reflects this. I wanted a stimulating, supportive home environment that would grow me.

Knowing…

In the areas of sex, desire, and longing I noted that I wasn’t lying to my husband Hank, but I also was not forging ahead boldly to speak my truth. Around this time my good friend Rose asked me if I wanted to meet weekly with her to support…

I believe that if you meditate on new possibilities, unforeseen brilliant solutions can come to you. I yearned to have a transformation in my marriage. Hank was a beautiful tender lover but we had a different pace around sex. On a recent vacation we had made love after…

I think there is often an over emphasis on the sexual aspects of poly. In my situation I still have a deep love for Hank (my former husband of twenty five years). Hank is my great love and continues to be my great love even though we are no…

I live with Hank, my former husband of 25 years, his girlfriend Valerie and my lover O and all our kids. Three years ago we converted our single family home into a duplex and moved our lovers O and Valerie in. Hank and I now live side by side,…

Currently I am writing a memoir about opening my marriage and falling in love with O.

Grace Comes First is my tale of reinventing my family. I wanted to find a way to keep my family intact while satisfying my sexual desires. It is my odyssey through the world of…